Toe up from the flo' up.

Well, I should just say it.

I will never have pretty feet.

Again.

I used to. They would glisten in the moonlight, shine brightly in the sun, even be admired by passersby for their lovely coloredness and french manicures that I used to get on my toes every couple of weeks.

Then, it all went down.

I'll never be the same.

I received a pedicure from a new place that had opened up in town.

Seemed legit.

Too legit to quit.

A couple of days later, TMI but some type of barbecue sauce began to expose itself from underneath my nails. Then they decided to leave my feet altogether. My toenails, that is.

I have ugly feet.

Because of one trip.

One bad pedi.

It's embarassing.

The last time I went and got a pedicure, I was too embarrassed to let my friend know that I was missing a few nails, so I decided to see how far I could go in the pedi process....and then the lady came.

Beast of a woman.

Standing an intimidating 5'1", she grabbed my foot like she'd been doing this all her life, and started to scrub my foot.

Oh boy.

She stopped.

She's staring......long stare.

She's starting to frown.

She turned my foot from side to side, zoomed in, face scrunched.

Don't ask.....

She asked.

"Why you ain't got no nail?"

I bit my lip....I didn't want to tell her. But I did.

I leaned over and in the hoarsest whisper I could muster, "Bad pedicure. They fell off. They'll never grow back."

I thought she'd kick me out. Yell, scream, say, "YOU AIN'T GOT NO NAIL! NO NAIL NO SHAME NO SERVICE!" and maybe throw a chair at someone walking on the sidewalk nearby.

Sometimes I overdramatize situations in my head.

She looked at me seriously for a moment, looked at my stub of a toe, and then smiled.

"It ok. I give you new nail."

I know I had a crazed look in my eye as she went and grabbed a fake toenail from her little drawers and glued it onto my toe.

A NEW NAIL!

It looked just like my old one used to!

I feel pretty, oh so pretty!

My toenail is one of the smallest and unnoticed parts of my body, but I chose to focus on it and put all of my unnecessary time, attention, and shame into it, claiming worthlessness because I lacked something small and not vital to me as a person.

I wonder how often I've done that in life. Lacking something I desire, maybe a talent, maybe a possession, maybe the inability to take a bad choice in my life back, so much so that I've taken my mindset off of what is beautiful and made in the image of Christ. What He's given me that is still in tact, that still works, that isn't broken....that I refuse to focus on.

One bad decision, one bad pedicure can take a piece of you. But you're still usable. You're still beautiful. While waiting for the shame of your imperfection to be exposed, He'll smile and reassure you. It's ok. He makes all things new.

Even if it's just a toenail.